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Clean Jokes

The Big Squeeze

The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet.

The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money.

Many people had tried… over time: weightlifters, dockers, etc., but nobody could do it.

One day, this scrawny little fellow came into the bar, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit, and said in a small voice, “I’d like to try the bet.”

After the laughter had died down, the bartender said, “OK”; grabbed the lemon; and squeezed away,

Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rind to the little fellow But the Crowd’s laughter turned to total silence… as the man clenched his little fist around the lemon… and six drops fell into the glass.

As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the $1000, and asked the little man: “What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight-lifter, or what?”

The little fellow quietly replied: “I work for the Australian Taxation Office


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